That’s true that reputation matters. But reputations are based on opinions, and people get their opinions swayed towards certain direction all the time. It’s not always even based on personal experience, since what 1 person can experience, is very limited. And by “very” I mean it’s so small amount, you couldn’t be able to put a number on it on limitless scale.
Why do I say that? Because 1 person can’t experience it all, not even a fraction of it. You say you haven’t heard anything good about him? Does it mean he’s 100% idiot? No. If I say I’ve talked with him and he’s not actually an idiot, would you believe me?
You wouldn’t. Since us people tend to group with like-minded folks and when we do, our opinions will be swayed towards how the “general” population in that group feels. If you’re in a guild that keeps talking bad about someone, there’s a high probability you’ll end up agreeing with them, even if you don’t have any actual and personal experience about the subject. That’s just how we are.
That’s why saying something like:
Doesn’t show the real side of things. There are always at least 3 sides to each story: Yours, mine and the truth. And for some reason us people like to hold on to that “mine” part mostly. It’s an ego issue I think…
And if someone calls “community trash”, then you must understand people who say that don’t usually mean 100% everything. Can’t, since how can they know each and every person anyway? That statement could only mean that there’s certain “breaking point” to each person and when they wanna vent things out. We’ve all done it. And we’ve all done it in some public forum as well online, behind our avatars, since it’s easier.
Heck, I’ve done my share of venting, sometimes even over nothing. And I’m 100% sure you’ve done something similar too. Does it mean everyone need to blacklist that person then? Of course not.
Example: That discussion about certain guild and how they treated certain player (topic around the forum) is based on peoples opinions. Even saw some “avoid these people” posts there, just because someone had a bad experience with them. Personally, I don’t base my opinions on what others say, since before I have experiences of my own, I can’t say if they are bad or good.
And in my experience, they’re not bad, since I’ve done dungeon runs with their guildmembers and they’re just fine. Friendly, talkative and act well.
Now, is my experience the “truth”? It is to me. Is it the complete truth? Obviously not. So should people avoid members from that guild? I’d say no, and the person who had bad experience would say yes. Who’s right?
Naturally we’ll base our expectations on the person who we’re closest to, so… opinions eh? Damn them
And with that, if I say Reavan’s a good person once you get to talk with him, would you believe me? I mean, now you’ve heard something good about him, right? Has your opinion changed?
I’m fairly certain it hasn’t, since you don’t know me or have had a chat with me, and I don’t know you. But those you play with you do “know” and if they say he’s a bad guy, you will trust their opinions more, letting it sway yours as well towards “Reavan must be bad guy”.
But all in all, yeah there’s truth in how things could’ve gone better. People could’ve said things better and suggestions and how they were received might’ve been done slightly more “civiliced”, or whatcha wanna call it. But like I said, there are those times when you just think “screw it all to heck!” and vent it out.
Also, if someone says community is trash, I still don’t believe they mean everyone, so they might’ve not meant you at all. No need to take it personally. I know (ok I hope… ) he didn’t mean people in our guild, for example, so I won’t take that personally and that’s because I’ve talked with Reavan and I base my opinions on those talks.
So that being said, which of us has the “right” opinion? Concerning the “truth” side, who knows. But chances are, since I think he’s not a bad guy, you think I must be wrong and that you automatically think I’m not someone you’d like to have anything to do with. I’m not in your guild, I don’t belong to your “space” of like-minded people, my opinion doesn’t matter or is just wrong or biased or something, since because you have certain opinion, it’s hard to think anything else, because we all got those egos we gotta deal with. But keep in mind that not everyone think he’s an idiot. I don’t think you’re an idiot, even if you have opinions about stuff that might not be same as mine.
Ok, this was wall of text… sorry about that. When your vacation just started and you slept late and are drinking your “morning” coffee, you get time to roll your face over the keyboard…