Diamond 10. Calling it ELO hell doesn’t even do justice to the soul draining mess this rank has become. It’s like you’re in some twisted purgatory bouncing between 0 and 3 stars like a ping pong ball in a game rigged from the start. You claw you grind you get that faint whiff of progress and then BOOM the RNG gods descend with their cruel irony just to say not today, buddy. Because why should skill matter when the game feels like a straight up slot machine?
Let’s talk about the players in this rank. You’ve got that one person who somehow always pulls every single high roll option out of the void, like they’re blessed by the algorithm itself. I’m sitting here with my decent plays calculating every move and here comes this guy stacking perfect cards like it’s some divine intervention. You think okay maybe next round it’ll even out. But then you watch in horror as they get exactly what they need every. Single. Time.
So there I was minding my business, clawing my way up to rank 9, 1 star, thinking finally I’m breaking out of this cycle. But just as I hit that sweet moment of false hope a busted mage pops up with a hand that’s clearly crafted by the RNG gods themselves. Oh, they needed that one specific roll to hit lethal? Of course they got it. What am I supposed to do with my perfectly “balanced” hand? Pray? Meditate on my life choices?
It’s like the game thrives on toying with your sanity. I’ve hit every possible wall squeezed every ounce of skill out of my plays and yet here I am grinding the same stars day in day out. You know what Diamond should really be called? RNG jail because the game’s too busy dealing blessed hands to opponents like it’s an deity handing out miracles.
So yeah, here’s to another epic day stuck in Diamond where skill takes a backseat to an RNG fiesta. The day I break free from this mess will be the day I make a shrine to the one good game that didn’t burn me with a last minute high roll.
Until then bring on the suffering because apparently that’s all there is down here in the underworld of ELO hell.