Now, I read your explanation of your character, and I like what I read! However, try to steer clear of too much headcanon. There’s nothing wrong with a bit of headcanon, where information is lacking in the original lore, but just be mindful when writing new stuff about the world and such. Developing these headcanons alongside a guild environment is recommended, especially if a guild has something in common with your character. For instance, Olodren here is in a guild called “The League of Modimus”, an all-dwarven guild with plenty of people from all dwarven clans. The dark iron clan are not completely fleshed out, so I essentially invented some burial rites for them (marking the deceased with a spot of ash on the forehead before they are put to rest). This is accepted, because there is very little in-game canonical lore around dark iron funeral rites and so forth. Just a thing to keep in mind.
It may be good to think of a few key words that apply to your characters, like I see you’ve already done. For instance, the word and concept of “duty”. As for describing a character, take heed not to get too lost in long and vivid descriptions. You may benefit from keeping things somewhat simple. Write only as much as is needed to get your point across in your “about” section, for instance. Sure, colorful writing is very aesthetically pleasing, but the sweet spot is to be able to be concise and well-spoken, so to say, at the same time. For example, if your character is rotund, you could do with about a line or two regarding his weight and width, and then you can carry on to the next feature. Give the reader just enough to get their imagination going! And avoid using exact measurements for character dimensions! An adjective or two will suffice.
Additionally, try to avoid putting backstory in a roleplaying profile! It is needless to say that any character who meets your character for the first time would naturally know nothing about your character, and thus it is pointless to write a whole section in your “about” that pertains to your character’s full background. It is better to keep these notes to yourself for reference, and it is far more satisfying for others to learn about your character’s past for themselves!
Also, for new roleplayers, I recommend playing a character who isn’t too old and “wizened”. It’s harder to play older characters with more experience, simply because you need to know more about the history of the lore to contextualise the character. Longer life equals more lore to read. Don’t be afraid to be inspired by your own life in building a character. All authors self-insert to some degree, simply because you cannot write something that has no influence from your own experience (believe me, I have tried and failed). Just be careful not to make your character identical to yourself! Additionally, do not be afraid to ask those more experienced than you about anything regarding lore or RP, even in-game! Most people, like myself, would be happy to give our two cents about any given situation.
I really hope you enjoy your time on Argent Dawn, that you experience the best a roleplaying realm has to offer, and that you stick with us for a long time!
-D.O. Darkstone