How sure are we, I mean… really sure, that all this Azerite is going towards healing Azeroth, hm?
He keeps saying things like: “I can feel Azeroth recovering her strength, thanks to you!” But we never see it happening with our own eyes, do we? And in fact Azeroth just continues to spurt Azerite all over the place, even though that sword only damaged her in the one spot and not in millions of little places here and there.
Sure, he’s got this so-called “Titan Chamber” set up where we lift the Neck and there are all these flashing lights and pyrotechnics. But this one time I was in there, “powering up” my Neck, and I was sure I could smell sulfur, and I KNOW WHAT SULFUR SMELLS LIKE BECAUSE OF WHAT HAPPENED WHEN I… (actually nvm).
Then, there was that “minion of the Old Gods” that showed up. Now, I don’t know about you, but I have about a hundred toys in my collection that can create comparable if not more impressive illusions at the push of a button. AND WE ALL KNOW the close relationship between toymakers and dwarves (looking at Greatfather Winter here).
As for this “crystalline form” he’s got, this other time, when I was watching him closely, I noticed he never sat down. Why not? Why doesn’t he sit down ever? We all know, every last one of us, how notorious dwarves are for wanting to sit down all the time. Well, I gave him a little poke, and the whole thing is a costume made of painted cardboard!!! He’s still the same old dwarf underneath. He also smells kind of bad, and if he was made of crystals, would he smell so bad? Hm? HMM??
It’s MY OPINION that he’s taking us all for a ride, Horde AND Alliance, and while we’re charging around in a frenzy collecting all this Azeroth for him, he’s stashing it all somewhere, like the crafty old schemer he is. Azeroth isn’t seeing a single drop of Azerite. And he just keeps saying things like, “I fear we still got a long way to go, Incandio!”
Aye, right.