Need IRL advice!

Hello lovelies! I hope y’all enjoy yourself in-game and out in the real world… (wait is that a thing?)

Sooo, I need help - and I’d like EVERYONE to reply (If you feel like it, of course!)

I’m new in managemement, I’ve got 4 people to “command”(Not sure what the proper word, in english is/are??). and I answer to 3 people at my work.
I work at a storage, and even though I complete all my tasks, my employees/colleagues smile, laugh and leave work happy, I satisfy my bosses and customers with our delivery times and services - I am STILL not pleased.

I’ve been doing it for the past 6 months now, and today, everything has worked out perfectly; not a single mistake.
Yet, here I am - asking for feedback, because I literally just wanna cry. Purely from a feeling of not being satisfied with my own effort.

I’d like some advice from you guys, and opinions… What can I do better? Why do I feel so sad, and displeased?

Have you ever been happy at work? Then ask yourself what have changed in the new position :). Maybe it’s just not suited to your own preferences

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Ever since I started there haven’t been a single day when I thought “Ohh god, I can’t be assed today”
Every single day, I’m getting up, and looking forward to work - because of the atmosphere between us colleagues is just fun, great, allows for some “damn this stupid - whatever it might be” conversations in our lunch room. The company leaders even suggests that we sometimes take 5minutes just to go and chit-chat in the lunchroom for a coffee etc.

Working morale is super high, and if we feel something is off, we can talk it out with our superiors with ease and they listen to us.

Management work is not for everyone. I refused several times managerial positions because I feel happier to be a code monkey.

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I feel challenged, motivated and I’m enjoying it, and the sensations I feel during a workday definetly keeps me motivated.

I enjoy being challenged in having to keep my employees motivated, making a few jokes here and there, whilst also keeping it serious, and I consider every day a new challenge to beat.

Perhaps, you are quite simply, depressed. No, seriously. Depression can strike any of us at any time for seemingly no reason. It doesn’t even have to be full on what you think depression is. It can be as simple as feeling empty, unfulfilled and wanting to cry. You can still feel happiness etc whilst having depression.

Now I’m not going to armchair psych you any further, I just want to put it out there. Consider it. Read about it, be concious of it and there is zero, zero, zero shame in seeking some help if this really affects you. A lot of people, myself included, only seek help when it’s gotten really bad because of stigma and pride.

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Do you maybe feel that there is no progression at your job? Your day to day working seems happy and a good working atmosphere, but maybe you are thinking “what is next?”

This - so much this - if there is no reason physically for you to feel the way you do, then you need to look at the psychological aspect. Call a professional, find something you do enjoy doing in your spare time, but do not suffer alone.

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It could just be anxiety, I remember I had a similar feeling more than a decade ago when I stepped into my first management position. The feeling that you should be the one with the answers, the polarizing shift of ownership suddenly being on you, things change, your outlook changes once you get into a leadership position.

What I’ve gathered and learned from over a decade in management is that you don’t have all the answers, you don’t know everything and are in fact very much fallible. And that is perfectly fine mate.

Very quickly your senior employees will likely become better, and know more about the work they do than you do yourself(If you are lucky to have good co-workers). And that too is normal.
The mark of a good leader is knowing how to utilize the talents of their subordinates.
I’m pretty sure you weren’t selected for the position because you packed boxes really good.
Sure it might have been a factor , but it was likely intelligence, passion, your drive.

Consider that it was in fact you that they picked, out of however many people were up for the job. Confidence will come, with time and with mistakes, and by god will you make mistakes.

Your Job is now a balancing act, of deflecting the clutter coming in from higher management and shielding your workers, while at the same time understanding what needs to be done, and getting it done.

If your guys are leaving work happy, and your bosses are content with your performance I’d say you are doing a bang up job!

I can’t speak for the work culture, but don’t hesitate to talk to someone over there, someone you have a good relationship with.

And while it could be that “Management is not for you” i feel like that is an oversimplification, judging by your post you seem to enjoy it as well .

You got this dude, relax, take a deep breath and remember, at the end of it all ur still human <3

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After each day has passed I always look back and consider what I can improve on, trying to strengthen my weak areas. So in a way you could say that my personal development is always what comes next.

I haven’t given this a thought at all, but my life in general is stuffed with happiness. Relationship is healthy, got a nice apartment with my gf and our financial situation is OK too.

I exercise from time to time, running and roadcycling. It’s good for cleaning my head.

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You make some very “obvious” statements that I haven’t given any thought at all.

Looking back at my job interview he kept saying that he thoroughly enjoyed my anwers, and he even called 4 hours after the job interview, offering me the job.

You’re on point with me, having the feeling of “not being able to answer questions, makes me look bad” - I am constantly trying to prevent it from happening, by always asking my bosses what to do if/and when.

I really feel “lonely” in the regard of not being able to talk, reflect and get an outside perspective on my actions, my train of thought and my lacking sense of satisfaction…

I spoke with my gf after work about how I feel, she didnt quite know how to respond properly - and i don’t have any friends in leading positions either.

Thank you so much for this! =)! It does mean alot to be recognized for ones effort!

Ah. There you go, you feel lonely. It is lonely at the top, they say. It could be simple insecurity with the pressure of the job, despite doing well, we all need reassurances. Maybe all you need is some reassurance and as you say, someone on the same work level to talk to.

I was a director for years (± 200 people working in my team) and was never satisfied. I changed function (same company) and now work operational (very specific expertise required) and every day my work brings a smile to my face. Reconsider your role, managing people always leads to a lot of energy burned and issues throughout the day.

Middle Management is tough. I’ve been there. (In an industry where I could even be sent to jail for three years if I made a mistake!).

Way to look at it is this, and I won’t sugarcoat it.

If your staff are happy in work, then you are doing your job right. Better than most, it sounds.

If your superiors are happy with your performance in the role, then you are doing the job right.

The key component that is missing, is your own personal satisfaction with how -you- feel you are performing.

Everyone else, from your description, think that you are doing an awesome job, So don’t change what you are doing, those under you think you are cool, those above you think you are ticking all the right boxes.

It does sound like an Anxiety issue, which you can get help with, and there is no shame for asking a doctor for help with.

Very wise piece of advice I once got from a lovely bloke, about ten years older than me, was this. He was a Falklands War Veteran soldier, and had…horrible PTSD issues, but what he said about health at work, and ability to cope is paraphrased thus;

“If You’ve got bad toothache, you go to the dentist, and no one looks at you shamefully for doing so. If you break your arm, you go to the hospital, and no one looks at you shamefully for doing so. If life, or you, break’s your mind a little, then why is that any different? Feel no shame, pick up your backside and get medical aid!”

He actually put it in cruder terms than that, but you get the idea.

It sounds like you’re doing your job role just fine, as it stands. Happy staff, Happy Bosses, You’re the one that is unhappy. Sometimes we don’t notice that when everything is going smoothly, there’s part that is desperately not OK?

Stick with what you’re doing. Talk to your local Doctor, and if they say “Yeah, we will give you this medicine to help” then so bloody what? No one at work needs to know, and it might be the relief that you need.

Trust me, Mental Health is just as vital as Physical Health, and should be regarded the same.

You are a perfectionist and it is going to be the hardest thing in the world for you to do. You need to let the control go and learn to except that if there are no complaints, no one made any mistakes and the work is being done you have done your part. At the end of a successful day, one with no mistakes, congratulate your subordinates and acknowledge them for job well done.

Perfectionists should never be put into management position because the drive the people below them crazy, they tend to micro manage and want to control every little thing their subordinates do. You will need to learn to let them do their work and make mistakes. Don’t hold mistakes against them. Don’t start with “Why did you do that!!!” but rather start with “I want you to learn from this. Now how do we fix this?”. Then help them to fix their mistake. You do that and they will not only not make the mistake again they will work harder.

You can either drive yourself crazy with “what could I have done more or better” or you “can learn to except that you have done all you needed to do” and be happy.

I know I am a perfectionist as well…

I’m not sure the WoW eu forum general section is the right place to ask advice about any IRL aspect. Else you might get some unsavory replies.

redouble the efforts if you feel you arent satisfied with your efforts.
you always know what makes you less happy, nobody but you know that kind of personal dilemmas.

You should think about talking this over with someone, perhaps a counsellor to start with. I too have a great life, many friends and run my own business successfully … but I also suffer from anxiety and depression which can suddenly hit for absolutely no reason. I know now how to pull myself out of it, it’s just finding the energy to do so.

You also did the right thing by posting it here as it really is helpful to talk and find you’re not the only person who has these problems and that they can be overcome, hard though it is.

As someone else said further up, going outside and exercising, even if it’s only walking and listening to music for half an hour, really helps.

Good luck!

You need to build something to feel like you are progressing in life. To give value for your time. Even when you love your job, going to work and getting paid doesn’t really give the sense of fulfillment (Except when you are doing something cool like bombing people from 32billion jet or wear cape and call yourself Batman)

Dont ask people on a wow forum, they wont give you a proper answer. Last place on earth to try that.