Not so new to RolePlaying but I struggle

I find difficult finding proper framing of how my character should look like, what is acceptable and what is not ?
Whats good to be put in TLRP?
Some general guidelines and framing is what I require because I struggle with it.

Side question: I find it hard to find a community, how do I do that?

Bonus question: Why is ERP so popular and at the same time such a stigma, from what I get its almost gamebreaking if you indulge in any light ERP or do I get the wrong impression.

Generally the RP situation in wow gets me really confused, ive RP’d before but wow is really different.

About how he or she look likes depend on how hardcore the Roleplayer is. Extrem Hardcore player say it is no go unless you go with a fitting transmog that is 1:1 with the description. Lenient people say description is fine unless you break the lore. So for example saying as a Blood Elf Warlock you have anything except green (and maybe purple too) eyes is considered No Go because it is canon that eyes change green thanks to Fel magic. About hights while the Non Plus Ultra would be writing your Meters but as there are not many (canonic) sources about how small or big a race is, there are fitting descriptions like average, high, small.
What is good to put in the flag are obvious things. If your character has a scar and that is in a place you can see it as long no armor is weared then write it down. If your character tend to have ink painted fingers and so should be visitable as long no gloves are weared write it down.
Basically Transmog/equipment management and Flags go Hand in Hand.

About eRP it is popular because sex sells and it is gamebreaking because most eRP players are not for lore. For example many are futas or undead pregnant death knights and we have no lore about futas and Pregnant DKs should be speak for itself. So the problem is not engageing in eRP itself but being it is against ToS as the game is for 12 years and the sex scandal with flirt removements are not helping either.

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