The Stormwind Times - Issue 22

Stormwind Times

Your local weekly newspaper, bringing you the latest and greatest from our nation’s capital.

Lion’s arrest

It seems there is turmoil within the Stormwind City Guard as one if its own has ended up in a cell block. Tension in the guard seem to be at an all-time high, with the recent shift in power causing a rift amongst the guards. It seems that Commander Curtes has little control over the unit and a bust up late last week ended up in one guard in custody. Details of the bust up remain hazy, but rumours circulate about a power struggle amongst some of the senior members, with a guard getting caught in the crossfire.

A young guard was seen fleeing the headquarters in a rage before she was apprehended and a fight broke out. The fight left one guard gasping for their life as another fled the scene. The suspect was later caught and brought in where they remain in a cell, awaiting a trial. None of the guards asked were willing to comment on the matter, leading more rumours to spread about the loose grip Commander Curtes seems to have on his squad. The ‘Times’ will continue to chase this story, and bring the citizens up to date with the internal affairs of Stormwinds ‘finest’.

Una-VOID-able Confrontations

Sunday of the 10th of the month saw the return of a name this reporter has not heard spoken in the streets of Stormwind for many months. Members of the Silver Hand, City Guard, Stormeagle Vanguard, and other military types flocked to Dustwallow Marsh in an attempt to halt her going for the mysterious “Third Door”. Their first obstacle were the dead themselves, as a necromancer rose to the task of attempting to thwart the group’s efforts to reach Ire. Apparently, the undead had no luck holding up to the might of the Silver Hand, the Knight-Commander and accompanying crew quickly extinguishing the artificial lights within the summoned piles of bones and anguish. According to eyewitness* reports, a former foe, long thought dead and gone, re-emerged to give the group a go-about. Moira Silentleaf was the name dug up by multiple sources, although reports of her execution leave me believing there’s more to this story than a simple body snatching gone awry. Interestingly, further sources commented on a Knight of the Silver Hand wielding the powers of shadow throughout the battle, an interesting development we would like to keep a close watch on. Paired with the concerns of a…ill-timed tryst with a succubus, we cannot help but wonder if the Silver Hand is letting a questionable member pass through their ranks. .

The details as to what happened next do not seem to line up, with multiple victims claiming the ground rose up to swallow them, others speaking to a portal that was wrenched open by the blood witch herself. The mysterious third door had been revealed, sending the group hurtling into what can only be described as a poor man’s Telogrus Rift. Rumours have it that the group was met with a void abomination, claiming to be the avatar of an old god, attempting to break into our world. The creature was destroyed with the help of Stormwind City’s heroes, many returning injured and finding themselves in the Cathedral infirmary, speaking to the harrows they undertook. Two of the group were suspiciously absent as the Cathedral filled with the wounded, Major Nakama Atlan and a woman whose name was not registered with the Cathedral of Light. Reports circulated that Atlan was seen returning to the city later the next day via a portal from Uldum, his business and reason for being in the desert largely unknown.

*Eyewitness accounts gathered largely by secondary sources, friends and acquaintances to those participating on the mission. Errors in reporting may have resulted.

Written by our roving reporter on the streets, Miss Erin Runeseeker.

Battle of the Wordsmiths!

On the eve of the 16th a large gathering, reports say up to 50 people at its highest, were witness to a contest of poetry. Several crafty wordsmiths representing several prominent inns of Stormwind displayed their skills before the gathered, many crafty wordplays and emotionally touching poems were presented before the judges. The competition was fierce but in the end, after careful thought and debate, the judge’s tallied scores and The Pig and The Whistle inn was declared the winner by a score of 127 points. The competition among the individual poets resulted in a surprising tie between the Lady Liandera Coresen and Cohlaz Valentis, who both were presented with a golden engraved trophy for their achievement.

Thanks to guest reporter Frederick Lioncouer

‘On Guard’ – our weekly city guard update

An announcement has come out of Guard HQ this week, stating that, in line with Stormwinds Military policy, Warlocks are now, officially, permitted within the ranks of the Stormwind City Guards. Commander Leofric Curtes stated that ‘it is time they were recognised for the valuable assistance they give to the alliance. Stormwind is there home too, they should be able to defend it’ The Commander was questioned about the dangers they could pose. ‘Strict rules are in place within the guard to ensure everyone’s safety. Warlocks will not be permitted to summon demons, for example, when on duty.’ This is one of many changes that seem to be occurring within Stormwind’s main defensive force.

Congratulations to Corporal Trystan Rhydderch, who was promoted to the rank of Sergeant last week. The thirty year old, who has been with the Guard for over six months now, has risen to the rank of Sergeant.

‘Light Bites’ – from the Cathedral!

Beloved brothers and sisters.

In these still trying times it is important to remind yourself of how by a seemingly unimportant gesture you can cause the Light to shine within yourself and those that pass your way. It can be a smile, it can be a nod, it can be a greeting, a well-wishing, a good morning, even.

By simply acknowledging the presence of another, you thus show them respect as per the first virtue.

If you keep doing this in spite of some perhaps sulking at you or even returning a rude word, you must remember to be tenacious in spite of such possible responses.

And by performing such small gestures you show compassion.

Thus you adhere to all three of the Light’s virtues. Thus you cause the Light to shine in anyone who acknowledges your seemingly unimportant gesture.

And thus you may cause a change for the better, perhaps for but a day, perhaps even a lifetime.

May the Holy Light bless and keep you and enlighten your day.

  • Mother Ewyllyn

A heartfelt congratulations goes to Sister Blair Santana, and Ricarde Grevehand, Captain of the Stormwind City Guard on the birth of there twins. Just before midnight on the 7th of this month, Caleb and Elisabeth Santana Grevehand were brought into the word. Both twins and mother are healthy and well.

Latest Titbits

It seems that theft cases are on the rise within the city. City officials are warning to citizens and business owners a like to take extra caution as a spate of burglaries in the city have caused much worry. Both the Pig & Whistle and the Blue Recluse have reported cases, along with a number of homes. Guards have been informed are investigating all reports.

One such burglary took place at the Mage Tower last week. An unknown Death Knight was found lurking in the Towers vaults, where it had seemed to bewitch the guards there, and was trying to escape with an artefact of significant power. The Stormwind City Guard were quick to respond and a scuffle took place in which the Death Knight was defeated. The Mages are looking into the incident.

An expedition force set sail to the north, recently, heading for a previously uncharted island. The Stormwind ship set sail last month for this new island, seeking to make landfall and survey the land, however no news has been received from the force and officials are starting to make plans for a relief force to be sent out. Captain Garrick is signing up eager adventurers to aid on this quest from the Stormwind Harbour and applicants should seek her out.

Madame Fort’una’s predictions and advice for masses.

Zis veek’s horoskope is for masters of elements and spirits…Shamans

Dreams kan kome true…but only if you’re villing to show up in your undervear in public. Who needs mask? It’s best to stay avay from unknown potions in Dalaran Severs and not traumatize little old ladies at Auction House zis veek. Vas zat stink bomb? Oh niet…just you.

(Madame Fot’una’s scribe would like it to be known that all predictions are transcribed accurately and fairly. And that any lawsuits should be addressed to Madame herself, not a poor, nameless intern who pissed off the wrong Magistrate.)

((If you want to get involved helping publish the Stormwind Times, contact Sprizzle-EarthenRing in game, or via mail, or contact Leofric#6992 on discord))

((If you have TRP-extended, search for player stashes on the Map. You’ll find the newspaper ICly in them!))

((IC and OOC comments always welcome!!))

A shame none of the eyewitness accounts were from a surprisingly knowledgeable merchant of cabbage.

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