This is a problem stemming from the inclusion of xrealm matchmaking.
While you can always find quitters, and some servers/factions would have more than others, it wouldn’t be allowed to persist the way it is now if it weren’t for xrealm matchmaking.
This is because there’s no accountability, no reputability and no familiarity between players this way. You are by design made to eventually forget the people you get matchmade with, both with and against. Some will forget faster than others, and some names will be forgotten faster than others as well.
We also tolerate much less when there’s no social awareness being enforced subconsciously, so it becomes a breeding ground for toxic outbursts as well. (Again, some people are more susceptible to get frustrated than others.)
All this makes you feel worse and worse as you keep exposing yourself to that kind of behavior, unless you manage to develop tolerance for it in your own head. But that’s only done by not caring anymore. If you stop caring, you don’t get affected by others.
But that’s called a state of apathy and is not something you should strive to achieve. It’s not something Blizzard should expose you to either.
If the queues would be limited to per realm, it’d also lessen the impact of premades in AV. Because it’s a large shared activity, and you’re more likely to develop a sense of camaraderie with others from the same realm if you encounter them often so it’d naturally and subconsciously breed teamwork.
Because with the naturally developed social awareness, you’d be mindful of your actions to avoid social repercussions on the server. It’d also reduce the prevalence of AFK players leeching.
Either that or they should just enable a blacklist of players in the xrealm queue that you’d never get matched up with. (Only on the same team, it’s not sustainable to allow players to blacklist opponents.)
It’d weed out the players participating in “bad faith” as it’s called. Because it’d naturally isolate them, even in an anonymous “playground” like xrealm matchmaking. (The impact on queue times would make it take longer for a lot of people though. But it’s basically like shifting the pieces of a puzzle around, and it being a puzzle that can take many shapes, so no piece becomes adjacent to a piece that was blacklisted by them. Keep in mind that the matchmaking system is robust enough to still keep the queues relatively fast despite such a metric for many people.)
The nature of this mechanism is also self-regulated, because if you place too many people on the blacklist then it’ll only serve to isolate yourself from the rest, so you’d get a natural incentive to reduce the people in your blacklist and try to sort out the ones that were the “worst” instead of just using it flippantly on everyone for every little thing.
It’d also create a huge consequence that’d push people into either transferring realm or rerolling (or quitting, but those kind of people are welcome to quit), because they themselves got blacklisted by too many people so others would create their own segregated space in the queue while the blacklisted person(s) would have to wait longer to find other people that also got blacklisted by a majority of players the same as they were.
In simpler terms: Actions needs VISIBLE consequences. Not the weak automated system that players just ends up ignoring.